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The Long Haul

The hardest thing starting at about three was my disturbed mind banging my head on the floor, later my attention-seeking behaviour always for the wrong reasons at my frustration at school. My mother got the blame as a bad parent but she was driven so never gave up. It turned into OCD from seven then suicide attempts at twelve & still running away from school as well as from home. From eight was sent to boarding school, told was for own good; male discipline but humiliation from teachers was always a problem as I found hard to follow instructions. The option for a special school my Mum thought would hinder me? But my self-confidence/esteem could not have been lower. I could never concentrate, even topics was good at. Distractions & tense, nervous energy the norm. Diagnosed at 44, medication doesn’t work, 54 now. Catastrophic thinking hinders & masking. Treatment options day-to-day is cycling, self-help books & talking to parents of children with it. Feeling locked in my head.

Dominic Gauden

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